poetry and perfection 22 to end bonus bonus

 and I have added a passage to explain the non appearance of Mr Worthington whom I forgot utterly. 

Chapter 22

 

Kitty scarcely knew how they got back to Sir James’s comfortable house, but when she woke up she was more receptive to the part she had played in capturing the notorious Hardcastle brothers, who would both live to be hanged.

“I am glad I did not kill a man,” said Kitty. “Oh, Louisa! How is your poetical courtship progressing?”

Louisa blushed.

“Sir James has asked me to marry him, and we hoped you would be my attendant. We have an ordinary licence.”

“I’d love it,” said Kitty. “Oh! Is Papa coming and will he mind waiting?”

“I wrote to him, when we repaired here, telling him that you were out of the inn, so he need not make his rheumatism worse by gallivanting after you, as I would bring you home when you were fit to travel and that you had accepted my offer,” said Hugo.

“Oh, I am glad; I do worry about poor Papa, he is sadly invalidish at a stupidly young age,” said Kitty. “As well as having cataracts. And he is no more than eight and fifty; it is not fair. He had rheumatic fever as a child, and though he has no heart problems, he has always had pains in his joints in the wet or cold. He always made an effort for us, but I cannot recall him as anything but old beyond his years; he and Mama had to wait for some years to have children, and then got a bargain bundle in twins, as you might say.”

“I will resign myself to the possibility of twins, as they seem to run in families,” said Hugo.

 

 

The blushing bride wore a gown of dull rose, with gold, pink, and grey beading on the bodice, tracing shapes of tulips. The groom also blushed. Kitty wondered why tulips affected them so; she thought them rather stiff and formal flowers. She had missed the inherent pun, and certain other characteristics of the tulip which the devotee of metaphorical poetry might discover. She borrowed Louisa’s grey gown so as not to upstage the bride, and to avoid clashing colours. The responses were made firmly.

Kitty enjoyed being Louisa’s attendant, and caught the bride’s bouquet, blushing.

“Hugo,” she said, “Let us leave the happy couple to each other; I will be miserable on the trip to London but let us at least return home, for everyone must be worried.”

“I have sent updates, but if you do not mind, I will make sure you are well wedged with quilts, which will also mitigate the cold of travelling at speed.”

“Hugo, you have a wide shelf between the wheels under the seat, for luggage. I could lie down there on quilts. It would shake less.”

“I… maybe. I am afraid of shaking you out.”

“Then put straps round me like luggage,” said Kitty. “I trust you, but I don’t trust myself not to fall out of the phaeton seat.”

“And it’s a long way to fall, and if I was cornering, I’d be concentrating and might not catch you in time,” said Hugo, shuddering at the thought of Kitty falling between the wheels. “Very well, I will rope you in like a delicate parcel.”

Kitty managed a wry giggle.

Sir James took time from his wedding breakfast to insist on providing a down mattress, which would conform around Kitty to hold her steady, and a quilt over her, for it would be cold travelling. And Kitty put on her nightcap for warmth and comfort.

“We wish you the best,” said the magistrate, shaking hands with Hugo. “A basket of food to eat on your way.”

“And Pringle, will you travel with us?” said Hugo. “I don’t anticipate there being trouble, but another man if we do overturn or anything would be invaluable and it saves you your fare.”

“I won’t refuse,” said Pringle. “I’ve never been in one o’ them there contraptions, but it should be an experience.”

“Put a muffler over your ears; the wind is cold, even in high summer. I’m going to let them find best gait, which is not their top speed, but is around twelve miles an hour,” said Hugo. “Kitty! That’s what high shirt points are for, to cover the ears.”

There was a muffled snigger from the pile of quilt which was Kitty.

“A muffler makes more sense,” she said.

 

It might be said that Kitty did not enjoy the journey home; but she did at least manage to sleep through a lot of it, and it was healing sleep, rocked relatively gently by the swinging of the suspended luggage box.

Hugo dropped Pringle off at Bow Street to take Kitty home, and Elvira and Stephen erupted from the door, followed by Mr. and Mrs. Worthington.

“Kitty!” cried Mrs. Worthington, “Oh! Is she badly hurt?”

“Strained her ribs catching burglars,” said Hugo.

“Oh, Hugo! You should not have let her!” cried Elvira.

“And pray, tell me, how I was I to stop her?” asked Hugo.

“No, nobody stops Kitty when she has the bit between her teeth,” said Stephen. “She will recover, though?”

“Oh, yes,” said Hugo. “Wake up, Kitty; we’re there,” he said, undoing the ropes.

Kitty shot bolt upright, banging her head on the underside of the seat.

“OW!” she said. “Did you say we’re home?”

“And everyone worried about you,” said Hugo, helping her out.

“Well, I don’t know why,” said Kitty. “I’m fine; I’ve been sleeping while poor Hugo has been driving.”

She scrambled out, with a wince or too. “Oh, Mama! Papa! Snotface! I am glad to see you all.”

She was hugged, and drawn inside, and there were more than a few tears shed, and Mrs. Worthington thrust Hugo into a chair, adjuring Stephen to put up his team as he must stay overnight and rest and recount all their adventures.

“Be fair, Mama!” said Stephen. “Either he can rest, or he can recount all their adventures, because with Kitty along, you can be sure they are not restful!”

“Hey!” said Kitty.

“Straw,” countered Stephen, going out.

It was an old nursery counter.

Kitty sighed in relief.

“Oh! I am glad to get home,” she said. “Hugo, I do want to marry you, but I want to spend some time being boring at home first.”

“I quite understand,” said Hugo.

He and his sisters left in the morning, and Kitty settled back into her routine, scoldings from Miss Emmett running off her back like water off a duck.

By the time a week had passed, Kitty was missing Hugo; but then he was announced, and she leaped up and into his arms.

Hugo cradled her to him.

“Kitty! So improper!” cried Miss Emmett.

“I’ve missed you, Hugo,” said Kitty.

“Kitty! You cannot call a man by his first name!” cried Miss Emmett.

“I’ve missed you too, Kitty,” said Hugo.  “I resisted the urge to write metaphysical poetry to you every day, though.”

“Well, you can kiss me instead,” said Kitty.

“Kitty! You must not demand kisses!” cried Miss Emmett.

Hugo kissed Kitty, and she kissed him back. Miss Emmett gave a little shriek, and trotted off at what, to her, constituted a run to find Mrs. Worthington.

“And I really cannot stay in this household any longer, if Kitty takes no notice of me and carries on behaving lewdly with strange men!” she cried, dramatically.

“What? Was that not Mr. Bottringham?” asked Mrs. Worthington, leaping up.

“Yes, that was his name, but… but he is not a member of the family….”

“He is betrothed to Kitty,” said Mrs. Worthington.

“But they are kissing in the parlour!” wailed Miss Emmett. “And he spoke of that lewd Elizabethan poetry! He will lead Kitty into ruin!”

“As he has been nursing her, without a breath of scandal getting out, that is an infamous suggestion,” said Mrs. Worthington. “And it will not unless your screeching alerts the servants that there is a scandal to be had,” she added, sharply. “Emmy, do not make a fool of yourself.”

Miss Emmett gaped rather foolishly.

“Can it be that you do not mind your daughter being manhandled by this…this libertine?” she demanded.

“I rather fancy the man who abducted Kitty is the libertine, not the one who rescued her,” said Mrs. Worthington, coolly. “Stop this silliness immediately!”

She swept into the parlour.

“That will do until he has his ring on your finger,” she said, crisply.

Hugo and Kitty fell apart.

“Sorry, Mama Worthington,” said Hugo. “I brough a betrothal token, and I was going to check Kitty hasn’t changed her mind. She hasn’t,” he added. “I hear Stephen asked Elvira; so we can have a double wedding.”

“Kitty, are you sure you don’t mind forgoing a season?” asked her mother.

“Nothing I’d like more,” said Kitty. “Did the fun bits, supporting Elvira. Nothing would induce me to have to go through that nonsense now I’ve seen it.”

“I won’t let anyone make you,” said Hugo. “Sophie is so looking forward to us being married, as you do not want her put in any home or sent away.”

“Never!” cried Kitty. “She is my dear sister.”

“You will have to wait a year if you want a double wedding, until Stephen is done with Oxford,” said Mr. Worthington, coming in.

“Hugo, should we?” asked Kitty.

“I want to say, ‘no,’” said Hugo. “But you know, my sweet, it would give you another year of… no, I’m not sure I can wait that long. We got too close.”

 

oOoOo

 

The wedding was in the autumn, after the end of the season, most unfashionably, and Kitty insisted on both Elvira and Sophie as her supporters. She wore a russet gown, embroidered with autumn leaves in various colours of autumn, and she looked a picture. Sophie and Elvira were in cream and russet.  The service over, the bouquet thrown to Elvira, the wedding breakfast endured, Hugo carried Kitty off, giggling.

“I hope your ten serving men are feeling up to it,” said Kitty.

“Wife, my ten serving men have been surviving by writing verses to each part as they strip you,” said Hugo, “And they are going to make you listen to each verse, and reply in kind before they move on.”

“Oh, Hugo! You are a m… monster of cruelty and so so enticing!” gasped Kitty, who was unravelling at the very thought.

“Well, now, I will start with your veil…”

“It doesn’t count,” said Kitty, tearing it off.

He laughed.

“Should I extract a forfeit for that?”

“You never had a rhyme for it.”

“You know me too well,” said Hugo, ruefully.

They were undressed, eventually, with much laughter and moans of frustration, and Hugo showed Kitty all about the many metaphorical places.

Later, much later, she snuggled in his arms.

“I am very happy,” said Kitty.

“So I should hope!” said Hugo. “I’ve been working very hard to make sure of that. My serving men are exhausted by milady’s demands.”

“Oh, really? I think my serving maids can visit new territory and explore, and oh, look! They planted a flag pole.”

“Kitty! You have woken up the tiger! Now you will hear him roar,” said Hugo.

Kitty gave a squeal and surrendered to the tiger.

 

 

Up next, some Cobra